H E L L O W O R L D

Gosh, how I've missed this blog...

I write posts in my head to it all of the time. Occasionally I sit down and actually start a post on a project, but then Kalia wakes up from her naps and needs me, and the moment and train of thought are gone. To be completely honest, I kind of have writers block with this blog right now. I mean, where do I start off? Do I just talk about my projects and ignore the fact that I've been M.I.A? Do I tell you about what I've been doing in the meantime?

For those of you that are strictly here for projects, those posts are coming. We've done so much to the house over the past few months, all of which I do plan on posting about.

For those of you that have emailed and commented asking how things are going, this post is for you.

Last month was a big one. I quit my job, turned 30, and became a stay at home Momma. I'm breast feeding Kalia, and she's never taken a bottle. So working (albeit from home, which was both nice and a nightmare at times) while being my little girls sole source of nutrition left me at the breaking point a few times. My sister in law asked how I was doing with it one day and I told her it was like a juggling act, but I kept dropping all of the balls. I didn't feel like I could give 100% to either work or Kalia, so something had to give. Being an Electrical Engineer isn't exactly a mind-numbing career, and trying to design and debug computer chips while nursing Kalia was just...beyond challenging.

I am so blessed and fortunate that we're in the position for me to walk away from my job. One of the reasons we waited 5 years before starting to build on our mini family was so that I could take this option if I wanted to. If you knew me in high school or college, I used to say I was never getting married and never having kids. I've got a million private reasons why I used to say that, but the bottom line was I hadn't met the right man that I could see forever with. And then when I did meet him, I wanted to make sure we were solid before expanding. I honestly don't think I ever realized how amazing all of this could be.

Now don't get me wrong, Motherhood is much more challenging than I ever thought possible, but it is also much more rewarding. So much more rewarding!

As for Kalia, she's growing like a weed and doing all sorts of fun things these days. She is 10 months old and started taking her first steps last week. She can crawl faster than Kodi can walk, is very energetic, doesn't sleep a lot, eats a ton, is quite animated, laughs a lot, is a complete goof ball, and is like a bull in a china closet when she plays. She's every bit our daughter, and there's not a single thing I would change about her. Well, maybe I'd like it if she slept a little bit more, but I can say she comes by it honestly!

So for all of the holidays I've missed on posting about, Kalia says :

Happy Thanksgiving!

Merry Christmas!

Happy New Year!

Happy Valentine's Day!

Happy 30th Birthday Mommy!




and finally...Happy Easter!

Thanks for all of the sweet emails checking in. I promise project posts are coming up next! Hope everyone has been doing well, and I'm excited to 'be back'!

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Happy Mother's Day AND a Sunday Funny!!

I just wanted to drop in really quick to say Happy Mother's Day to all you wonderful Momma's (including all of mine!!!) out there!

I'm posting my first ever video on here as a Sunday Funny, which I thought was perfect for Mother's Day.  Only because it's me videoing my first born a year and a half ago.  Furry sons count as first born's...he's given us lots and lots of practice!!

Before you view it, you should know that Kodi is a lot like his Momma.  He's accident prone (I can't even tell you the number of bones I've broken, scars I have, or times I've had surgery for one random thing or another...at one point I had both my right hand and left leg in a cast...and no, I wasn't in a car accident.  It just happens.).

Kodi's got the most sensitive pads of any dog ever.  He runs on the grass, because if he runs on pavement or concrete, his pads tear open.  My T. Mom got him 'shoes' a few years ago to try to see if those would help.  I completely forgot that I recorded his first ever 'trial run' with these 'shoes' on.

It was my first time using the video camera, so please ignore the bad lighting and hopefully it doesn't make you too dizzy.  It's too funny to not share!  It's my first time uploading any video from this video camera too, and I have no idea how to edit it down to be a smaller clip size, so just close out of it when you've had enough Kodi.  I'm not sure it's possible to get enough Kodi, but I 'spose you might not all feel the same way!

Hopefully I'll be a little bit nicer with Kalia...I'm pretty sure I'm not winning any Mother of the Year Awards with postings like these!!

Hope everyone's enjoying their day!!  Oh, and one last thing...Sassy Sites is featuring me on their Sunday Spotlight today!!  What a fun soon-to-be Mother Mother's Day surprise!  Go over there and check it out!

Happy Sunday!

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Welcome to My Birthing Month!

Hey guys! Hope you guys had a great weekend!

I'm going to show you some updates we did around the house this weekend, but I didn't get time to write up any posts with my restless exhaustion (explanation below), so those will have to be later on in the week.

But...I'm writing a post anyways...to ask you to please go over to Mandi's blog from Vintage Revival : http://vintagerevivals.blogspot.com/2011/04/epic-giveaway-linky-now-open.html, scroll down to entry number 98 (that's me!!!), and click on the star / vote link (after the title) to vote for me to get Mandi to come here to help us with our living room disaster.

Why should you vote?  Well, because you like me!!!  And, as one of my bloggy friends Jennibell put it, if I win, you guys would win...because I would of course take step by step, day by day (oh baby...wow, I just aged myself...just a little New Kids on the Block for ya!) pictures along the way and you guys could live through the makeover vicariously through me.  Sounds fun, right?!  :-).  So please, head over to the link and vote!

..........

As for this weekend, I did a little bit of projecting, a lot of shopping closing out our registry items that we needed to get before Kalia gets here, and a lot of napping.  I'm in a weird place right now with my pregnancy...I'm exhausted and restless at the same time.  I lay down to nap because I don't think I can keep my eyeballs open any longer, and then my brain starts thinking of all of the million things I should be doing instead of napping.

It's hard to turn the thing off.  I think it's a combo of old habits (being go go go ALL of the time), and nesting.  Whatever it is, it's annoying!  Which means...I'm annoying right now too I'm sure.  Poor hubs.

I'm so excited that May is FINALLY here though.  It means it's Birth month!!!  Woo Hoo!!!  I'm not even slightly entertaining the thought that I'll go late and into June, so please don't burst my bubble.  I live in Florida, it's hot here, and Chris is tired of me freezing him out every single night because my new comfy temperature is 68 degrees.  Normally, I'm the one that's freezing, and he's hot...I like to keep our a/c around 80.  I think most mornings you can wake up in our house these days and see your breath in front of you.  It's that cold.

I've almost completely finished Kalia's nursery too.  I've got to find time / energy to blog about those too, which I'll hopefully do soon.  The only thing left to work on in there is finishing up her quilt that I'm making.  Me + sewing do not equal BFF's, that's for sure.  But...I'm still stubborn, so I think that'll win out.  I'm hoping at least!

I'm breaking all of the rules and not posting a picture in this post.  I'm too tired.  Sorry guys!!  I'll be back later on in the week to show you some sprucing up we did this weekend!  Hope everyone has a Happy Monday!!

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A.D.D. at its finest

The weekend of my Tampa baby shower, we had a house full of people.  We have four bedrooms and an office room in here, and every single one was booked.  We actually had to have two people (thanks Jenny and Christina!) bring their own air mattresses so they had something other than the couch or floor to sleep on.

The Wednesday before everyone arrived, on our nightly walk, Chris and I were talking about how much we needed to get done around the house to prep for everyone getting here.  Our fridge was empty, the floors needed to be mopped, the bathrooms needed to be cleaned, I needed to fold and put away my laundry, and everything just in general picked up, amongst other things.  I don't know about you guys, but when we're busy projecting, much of the rest of the house gets pretty neglected.

So we got home, made and ate a quick dinner, and decided we were going to go our individual ways to get our specific chores done.  Normally we do things together, but my preggo belly limits what I'm capable of getting done, so I pick the 'easy' tasks while Chris does the chores that includes chemicals and things that are going to kill my back to do.  We put our hands in, said "ready...break" and went about our business.  Yes, we're dorks...I know.

Our house is large enough that it's easy to lose each other in the midst of tasks.

About an hour later, I came inside from the garage to see how Chris was doing.  Let me digress a bit and explain that when we moved in, we had a full speaker system throughout the house.  It was so rocking the 1980's vibe with its yellow face plates and huge knobs.  As we've redone every room, we've removed the speaker...but not necessarily fixed the holes that the speaker was in.

I asked Chris to spackle the hole we made in Kalia's closet when he got a few...like right after we built the closet, and when I came in last Wednesday, this is what I came into :

Kalia's closet is now spackled

The speaker hole in the daybed room is now drywall patched and spackled

As is the speaker wall in our bedroom

Along with this little hole in our vanity / closet area. (Sorry for the pic quality, no natural light comes in this area!)

I put my hands on my hips and asked Chris why the heck that was important to do before everyone got here, and he grabbed my hand off of my hip and directed me to the garage, where I'd been hiding for the last hour doing this :

Hmmm...he had a point!  Apparently it was more important in Chris's mind to patch the holes than do any of the actual cleaning chores, and it was more important in my mind to get the first coat of blue on Kalia's dresser than it was to take care of this mess :

This is my pile of clothes that I frantically try on anytime I have to go out in public.  They all cover my big 'ol pregnant belly, but for some reason I have to put all of them on before I can decide on an outfit!

or this one...

Chris does laundry in our house.  Most of the time I get a pile of neatly folded clothes on my side of the bed.  Chris apparently ran out of steam to do laundry too and just threw them all up on my dresser!

We actually did get the house to a 'good enough' state, with all of this stuff picked up, before everyone got here on Friday.  Even if it wasn't really what our A.D.D. selves wanted to do!  And we even had dinner on both Friday and Saturday night, as well as breakfast on both Saturday and Sunday, and lunch on Saturday ready for everyone too!

And then once everyone left...I passed out!  Just keepin' it real!

Oh, and on a side note...don't get too excited about the bright blue you see on the dresser.  It's gone through a million different steps since I took that picture...that's just a sneak peak of the base layer!

Happy Wednesday!

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Valentines Day Recipes

Normally for Valentine's Day, we do small things for each other.  We write sweet letters, leave hidden notes in places, bring the other one coffee in bed, etc..  If we do buy gifts, they're pretty small.  Sometimes one of us makes dinner for the other one, which varies year to year, and other years we'll go out to celebrate.

Keeping up with our normal Valentine's Day routines, I bought Chris a pair of slippers.  He's been complaining about getting up and walking around with his feet freezing, so I thought it was a cute gift that he didn't necessarily ask for.

And he got me beautiful diamond earrings.

Hmph.

Chris's reasoning was that it's the last time he can go 'big' with these kinds of gifts.  After May, our priorities shift with little Miss Hart coming into the world.

But that's okay...even though our gifts are lopsided, which we never actually care about, I know my husband well enough (and he knows me well enough) to know that for him, the way to his heart is through his stomach, and for me...Diamonds are a girls best friend!

Chris came home from work to this in the making :

Apple Onion Pork Tenderloin with glazed carrots and mashed potatoes.  I really wanted to put this on our fancy china and actually plate it so it was really pretty.  I'm clumsy enough as is though, and adding pregnancy instability to that made me decide to just use our every day plates.  It took me about two hours to make this from start to finish, and it was absolutely delicious.  Not just being arrogant here, it really was!  Recipe at the bottom of this post!

After we ate dinner, we had to rush off to Chris's volleyball game.  So romantic, I know!  It's so hard to sit on the bleachers and just watch and not be able to play!  He won all three games (yay!) and then we headed home for dessert.

And as most of you know, I do not bake.  But I did have something fancy planned for dessert.

Banana Foster (sans foster for my preggo self!) fondue.  Eat your heart out Melting Pot...mine was sooo good!!!  Recipe for that at the bottom of this post too.  This one is simple!

So that's our Valentine's Day in a nutshell.  I tried to fatten Chris up, and he dazzled me with diamonds.  So sweet, right?!

Here's the promised recipes.  Hope everyone has a great Tuesday!

RECIPES:


Apple Onion Pork Tenderloin:
Ingredients:
1 pork tenderloin, cleaned and divided in half. (I saved the second half and will cook that this week with the left over sauce.  You could cook both though if you'd like a bigger serving).
1 red onion, thinly sliced.
2 Granny Smith apples, peeled, seeded, and cut into 8 wedges
2 cups apple cider
1/2 cup apple sauce
1 1/4 cup reisling wine (any sweet white wine will do)
1/2 tsp cayenne pepper
2 tablespoons unsalted butter (cut into small cubes) (I just used spread)
1/2 cup chicken stock
8 whole cloves
2 tablespoons brown sugar
1/4 cup all purpose seasoning (I have no idea what this is...I just used my chicken and poultry seasoning, and it tasted fabulous!!)
1 tablespoon black cracked pepper
1 tablespoon vegetable oil (I used olive oil)

Directions:
Sauce
Combine apple cider, 1 cup of wine, cloves, cayenne pepper, 1 tablespoon brown sugar, and chicken stock in 1 1/2 quart sauce pan.  Cook on medium high heat and reduce by half.  Remove from heat and set aside.
Preparation
Coat pork tenderloin with all purpose seasoning and press cracked pepper into meat until it's thoroughly coated.
Pre-heat small skillet on medium heat.  When hot, add oil to coat bottom of the pan.  Place pork in pan, and slowly turn meat as it browns.  When its browned, remove from pan and place in a broiler on 350 degrees and set 10 inches from heat.  Cook until the center is 150 degrees (depending on the thickness of your tenderloin, this can take between 45 - 60 mins).  Remove from broiler and let rest (don't cut into it just yet!).
Finish the sauce by removing cloves from liquid, return pan to heat and whisk briskly.  When mixture just begins to steam, not boil, add apple sauce and remaining brown sugar.  Remove from heat and whisk vigorously to blend completely.
Using the same skillet you cooked the pork in, add butter, apples, and red onion slices and return to heat.  Slowly stire ingredients until apples and onions begin to brown.  Remove from heat, add 1/4 cup wine and stir well to deglaze the pan (I skipped the added wine here since it wouldn't be cooked...so I can't say what that part tastes like, but the apples and onions were surprisingly (to us anyways!) delicious!)
Take pork tenderloins and slice in half-inch medallions.  Pool sauce on service plate and place slices of pork so they slightly overlap each other.  Arrange apple and onion mixture around meat.  Pour sauce around apples and onions as desired.
Enjoy!!!

Bananas Foster Fondue

Ingredients:

4 ounces white chocolate, chopped into small pieces
4 ounces caramel
1/2 banana, peeled and thinly sliced
1 tsp banana liqueur (I left this out, but would try it if I wasn't pregnant!)
1 tsp spiced rum (ditto here!)
desserts for dipping into fondue (I used pound cake, cheesecake, marshallows, rice krispy treats, bananas, and strawberries)
Directions:
Melt chocolate in microwave in 30 second increments.  Stir inbetween each iteration of the microwave, until its melted.
Place banana slices in the bottom of the fondue bowl.
Pour melting chocolate ontop of bananas.
Blend the caramel with the warm chocolate on top of the bananas.
I just enjoyed this from here, but if you're not pregnant : add banana liqueur and rum to the pot and carefully stir the mixture together.
Enjoy!!

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I'm linking up to the parties on my sidebar.  Go check out everyone else's yummy recipes!

My To-Do List 2011

Whew, you guys sure are exhausting!!  Looking at your to-do lists from last Friday's giveaway post (the giveaway is open until 8 p.m. EST tonight...so enter HERE if you haven't yet!!) is making my list feel more and more normal.  So thanks for that!

In the spirit of sharing, and because it's been floating in my head all January, I thought I'd share my to-do list with you guys.  I'm trying to limit this to just house projects, so the whole child bearing and being a good Mom thing isn't on here...but those are most definitely my top priorities!

1. Transform the junk room into a nursery

• paint the ceilings, walls, trim, and closet
• rip out old carpet and install new flooring
• install a new window
• install a new fan
• build and install bookshelves for the wall
• build and install custom closet
• find and refinish an old dresser for a changing table
• make nursery bedding
• decorate

2.  Finish the pool deck to be able to at least bring in the furniture

3.  Learn to sew (see make nursery bedding!)

4.  Re-do the laundry room

5.  Re-do the entry closet.  Build a storage locker system to go in there.

6.  Re-do our master bedroom

7.  Decorate the living room

8.  Build pottery barn bar thingy to go in kitchen

I actually have more in my head, but I'm starting to get stressed out just thinking about how much I want to get done this year!!  I'm actually REALLY excited about the nursery, which is the only thing on this list that I MUST get done in 2011.  Oh, and 2 and 3 would be super nice...2 because it's been an ongoing project, and 3 because I can't finish the nursery stuff without learning how to sew.  The rest on that list though would just be icing on the cake.  Although with a wee one in tow, I'm guessing the laundry room redo will move up on that list too.

I'm so grateful that I have my husband back to do all of this with too!!  Poor guy...I've completely taken his newfound 'free' time that he had due to being done with his Master's program and filled it all up!  

Happy Friday everyone!  Tune in tonight at 8 p.m. to see if you've won the $35 giftcard!!

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And I'm Out!

Well guys, this has been an amazing year. I love this blog and the feedback I get from it, so thank you so much for all of your support over the past year.

But I'm taking a few weeks to do what I haven't done in a long time. Spend quality one-on-one time with my husband. Without school, without computers, without work, just us. Pre-Chris's schooling days, we were pretty inseparable. I'm so excited to take these next few weeks to go back to our place of happiness...being together with no stress.

Our friends Erin and Chris joke with us that we're Amish because we don't watch much TV. The next few weeks is going to be filled with very little electronics at all. Do you hear that? It's the sound of heaven...ahhh!!!

So, while I know you're not supposed to take 'blogging breaks' if you want to make your blog a success, I'm hoping that you guys will stick around to see what 2011 brings us.

I do have a promise though that hopefully entices you to stay tuned till I return next year. I promise I'll be back, on my one year blog anniversary (January 13th), and I'll post a BIG huge project reveal that you most definitely won't want to miss. We've been working on this one for quite some time, and I can't wait to share the big reveal with you guys!!

So here's hoping you a Merry, joyous, wonderful Christmas season, and a New Year filled with hope, inspiration, love, and joy!

See ya on the flip side!!!

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Cold Florida Winter

Dear Weather,

I think you're confused. I know you've got a great big job to do with weathering the whole world and all, so I understand some mistakes every now and then, but this is the 2nd winter in a row. Which makes me think I should probably bring it to your attention.

I LIVE IN FLORIDA. The TAMPA BAY area of Florida to be exact. It is NOT supposed to get into the 20's at night, and we're most DEFINITELY not supposed to not get above something in the 40's during the day. I think maybe you're confusing us with some other state. The only thing I like to do in the cold in snowboard, and since Florida doesn't have mountains, I don't really want it to get cold enough to snow here.

This week is better than last, but it seems to be getting cold again, so I thought I'd throw out a little note. Maybe that'll help. Good luck with the rest of your weathering duties! Merry Christmas!

Sincerely,
Kara Hart

Granted, this picture was taken two weekends ago, not this past weekend, but I still thought I'd share. This is how Chris and I sleep during the frigid Florida winters :

In our living room, snuggled up next to the fireplace.

Sorry for the picture quality, it was obviously dark when I took it!!  We actually moved the mattress a bit closer to the fire too...this was just all I could move it on my own...it's heavy!  Kodi sleeps behind us in the living room because he doesn't like the cackling of the fire, but he enjoys the warmth too.

Most Florida houses aren't equipped to handle 20 degree weather, but ours is even worse.  We have no heat pump.  Last winter, the warmest we could get our house was 64 degrees, and our heating bill was RIDICULOUS, so we've just accepted the fact that we don't have heat and deal with what we do have!  We've actually got two space heaters that heat up our bedroom and office quite nicely, but there's something cozy about still moving our mattress out to the living room in the winter.  It's like we're camping cozily.  Just my style!

Hope everyone is staying warm this winter!  I know, I'm a baby when it comes to cold...but I was born and raised in Florida...the central florida area, on the coast.  I think high 60's is freezing during the day...40's?!  That's just crazy talk!

Happy Monday!  Hope everyone has a great week!

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New Project

Chris and I worked on a few projects together this weekend. While I do love having my husband to do projects with, these projects aren't exactly the fun ones that I love doing with him. We did his school projects...and since you guys like seeing pictures, here's one of the things we were working on :

Oh yeah, 2 microcontrollers that talk to each other.  I've told you what dorks we are before...do you believe me now?  Anyone want any step-by-step instructions on how to program this up?  Or how about a 10 page report on all of the software and hardware that went along with making it possible to write my husbands name on it?  This picture was actually taken for the report, not for your viewing pleasure...but since this is a project blog, and that's my latest project...well, I thought I'd share!

The other project that Chris wrapped up this weekend that we've been working on for weeks was pretty close to what I do on a day to day basis.  Lots and lots of code and waveforms.  Anyone want to see a screen shot of a bunch of lines of code or some waveforms with a bunch of signals traced?!

Yeah, I didn't think so...just thought I'd check.

It was quite reminiscent of our college days together though.  Chris moved in our big 6 ft table and we worked side by side in the office.  I'm not used to having an 'office mate' anymore!  This is how we went through our undergrad degree together our last year.  Side by side, working together.  When you can work with someone on this kind of stuff, and then still have an amazing time doing all the fun things in life, you know you've met your soul mate.  Things are just better together.

I took this picture this morning...Chris's laptop was set up on the other desk.  The office is in major need of some redecorating...it's on my 8 million mile long list of things to-do eventually.

I called it quits relatively early last night and climbed in bed to watch Sunday night football.  When Chris came in at half time with a glass of wine and said he hit submit on his final report, for the third time in a little over a week, I cried.  These tears were tears of joy though.  He just has to have a telecon with his TA tomorrow morning on his drive into work to go over his report, and he's done.  Forever.  He finished.  He made it.

WE made it!!!  I'm beyond proud of him, words can't even begin to describe all of the emotions and the huge sense of pride I have in him.  He was a full time student as well as a full time employee, even earned a big promotion while going to school.  On top of being a wonderful husband.

I'm not going to sugar coat it, there were so many times over the last year and a half that I thought I can't do this anymore.  There were so many times that HE thought he couldn't do it anymore, but hand-in-hand, side-by-side, we did it.  Chris was always so grateful for all of the housework that I picked up so that he could focus on school, and has been so supportive on all of my projects that I've attempted solo.  I kept telling Chris that he could finish getting his Master's, that I could help, and that it wasn't impossible (even when I really thought it was).  Our undergrad Electrical Engineering degree was a tough program.  I remember phone calls home during college, bawling my eyes out saying that there was no way I could do it.  It was just too hard.

I know how hard the EE Master's program was, and I honestly don't think I could balance work and school as successfully as he did.  My brain turns off after work...I couldn't watch 2 hours of class or do homework and projects after working all day.  Chris did.  For a year and a half.  And he's DONE!!!  WOO HOO!!!

I'll stop my gloating now and get back to work...I did manage to finish up my one homemade Christmas gift this year, so stay tuned for a post on that later on this week!

Happy Monday!  This might be the happiest one yet for me for the past year and half!!

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Perspective

Sorry for the lack of posts...I know I promised pictures of the baby shower, and I will post those before too long.  Life got in the way of posting it last week...

I debate writing about my personal life on here...I debate how much you'll want to read, or who will want to read about it.  But this blog is my creative outlet, and part of my creative side is my love to write.  I find it therapeutic.  It's the only way, besides running, that I know how to organize my thoughts and put things into perspective.  So I'm writing this with  no clear direction of where it's going, just a lot of heavy thoughts weighing on my mind that need to be sorted out.

Last week, Chris got really sick on our drive back home from Thanksgiving.  We thought maybe he ate something that gave him food poisoning...he got sick for about 7 hours straight, finally managed to pass out, and after a full day in bed, seemed to relatively recover.

It wasn't food poisoning.  It was a virus.

I got it Wednesday night.  And then I spiked a fever Thursday, and wound up in the doctor's office at 6 p.m. with him giving me his last ditch effort of anti-nausea medicine and saying if that didn't work within 30 minutes, I was to go straight to the ER to get an IV of fluids.  My body ached, I was chilled to the core, and I couldn't have felt more miserable.  On our way home from the pharmacy at 8 p.m. that night, I broke down and started sobbing.  Not just crying, bawling crying.  I don't remember the last time I've cried that hard.  It was just all too much, and I couldn't take it anymore without breaking down.

Chris has a week left of his school, and he needs my help to be able to finish up his last 2 projects.  He couldn't work on either one of them Sunday or Monday because he was so sick, and then Wednesday and Thursday he couldn't do them either because I was so sick.  I sobbed because I felt sorry for him.  I feel the pressure of his schooling almost as much as he does most days, and I don't know how, with the stressful jobs we have, he gets it done.  This semester is his last, but it's been his hardest.  He needs my help, and instead of helping, I took away precious time that he didn't have to give.

I don't like feeling helpless or defeated.  I don't deal with it well, and there was absolutely nothing I could do to make either him or I better.  I didn't want to take away anymore time and have him bring me anymore water or gingerale, but every time I got up, I puked.  I sobbed because I was helpless, and I did have to rely on my husband...my husband who will give his time, stay up till midnight working or doing school, and get up at 5 to start it all over again.

I'm overloaded.  I've got too much on my plate, and I'm not quite sure how I'm going to get it all done.  I sobbed because I used to be able to be superwoman all of the time...and right now I just can't.  And I don't know how to deal with that.

On top of a million other personal things that probably seem either insignificant to most, or are too detailed and time oriented to write about, one of my Grandfather's has been in the hospital since before Thanksgiving.  My Mom has been prepping me that they thought the end was getting near.  My Grandfather has lived an amazingly blessed and fulfilling life.  He's 92.  My Grandmother was lucky enough to meet him, the love of her life, later on in life.  They've been married 20 years, and she's 20 years younger than he is.  I sobbed for her...for my Grandma.  I sobbed because I knew how hurt and sad and heavy her heart has to be.  My Grandfather will be fine...he's lived a great life, had many amazing experiences, and his time has just come.  But she waited a long time to find him...and she deserves to be happy, and I'm worried that she won't be.  So I sobbed.

This evening, my Grandfather passed away.  He passed away peacefully and without pain, which he was in previously, so that's reassuring.  But my Grandma....  My heart is so heavy for her.  I will miss my Grandpa dearly, but I know that I'll reflect upon his quirks, funny demeanor, and various stories that he's told me throughout the years fondly.  My Grandma has to be so sad.  She loved him so much.  They even refused to get any bigger than a queen sized bed because they felt like they slept too far apart in a King.  She liked keeping him close.  Although my heart is heavy, I am so thankful that she met him.  She had 20 great years of laughter, love, and companionship.  She will be able to forever cherish and reflect on the memories they created together, and I really hope that one day soon she can look back fondly on them instead of looking on with sadness.

So...this evening I sobbed for them, my Grandparents.  And in doing so, I felt so silly for my sobbing for Chris and I on Thursday.  It seems so insignificant.  We have each other...work, school, and everything else will work itself out.

And as I've written this, I've stopped sobbing.  My head feels clearer.  My heart is still heavy, but for the right reasons instead of the wrong ones.  Death is a tricky subject to address, and I know I'm not any good at it, but I find peace in knowing that my Grandpa is in a better place and lived a great life.  All I can do for my Grandma is to be there for her and be supportive of this new journey she'll embark on while surrounding her with love.

Thanks for letting me clear my head...

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Thankful Thursday

The Cape on the Corner is doing a blog series for the month of November.  Every week, on Thursday, you write 5 things that you are thankful for that happened over the past week.  I think it's important to realize the positive things that go on every week, so I'm joining this week!  Here goes...

1.  I'm thankful that my in-laws made the 7ish hour trip down to visit Chris and I last weekend.  They came down in May, so it was technically our "turn" to go up there to visit them, but with our zero vacation days, they decided they'd take off Friday and head on down.  We won't be able to see them for the holidays this year, so it was definitely a nice treat to be able to spend quality time together before years end.

2.  I'm thankful that I've got two of my nieces Christmas gifts already.  I'm still working on the third nieces...but these two are off the list! And I got them gifts that I'M super excited to give them because I really think they'll like it...which is the best combination!  I love hunting for and finding the perfect gift.

3.  I'm thankful that my uber busy husband that has no clue how he's going to finish all of his projects and study for all of his exams before the end of the semester (and graduation!!! T-minus 4 weeks and 5 days...ya know, if you're keeping count...) took time out of his day of dedicated school work on Sunday to go for a long walk with me down to the old orange and lemon groves to see if any had ripened or not...even though he knew they'd all still be green.

4.  I'm thankful that the weather has been so gorgeous this week, and that it's started to warm up a bit, but is still at a comfortable temperature.  Our heat doesn't work, so there were a few uncomfortably cold days in this home over the weekend, but I'm thankful that the sun is shining and I can go for a jog without being too cold or too hot.

5.  I'm thankful to have such great friends that keep up with and truly care how I'm doing on a daily basis.  I'm not the easiest person to be friends with (I don't like chatting on the phone too much), but my closest friends don't care that I can't or don't call them on a daily, weekly, or even monthly basis...they find other ways to keep up with me, even if I'm the only friend they do that with, and I'm forever grateful to them because of it.  I only have a handful of really close girlfriends, but those girls are the absolute best, and they're always there when I need them most!

6.  Sorry, gotta add one more.  As always, I'm thankful for this guy.  He makes me smile, laugh, and reminds me not to take life too seriously on a daily basis.  It's amazing that someone who can't talk can teach me how to enjoy the simple things in life.  He's the best dog in the entire world...and I will be forever grateful that he picked us!

So that's my things this week.  What do you guys think?  Do you do anything special to remember things your thankful for this month?

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Confessions of an Amateur Builder

Those of you that follow my weekly posts (and not just projects) know that at one point, I was ready to throw my daybed into the garbage. Well, you knew that I was ready to throw my big project into the garbage, you didn't really know that it was a daybed just yet. Yesterday's post would have been entirely too long if I delved into the disasters that happened while building that daybed, and some of you like to see eye candy, while others of you actually read what I write.  I understand both, I truly do.  For the latter, this post is for you.

My problems with the daybed started at the Big Orange. I'd had a problem with the Big Blue cutting things correctly, so I headed to the Big Orange instead. I never quite know how to act there where I'm buying a few huge sheets of plywood and am asking them to cut it into very specific measurements. I know I'm being a pain, but I still want to cut and measure and cut and measure. The cut guy at Big Orange was amazingly awesome. He did exactly that, all on his own...cut, measure, cut, measure. He's any amateur builder's dream cutter.

The problem? To be quite blatant about it, the wood just...well, sucked. I got the Birch Plywood which was actually more expensive than the Blondewood Plywood I had gotten from the Big Blue for my last project. I'm night blind, which makes places like dark lumber departments hard to see knitty gritty details of the quality of the wood. When I got home with the plywood and started sanding, all of the pieces were...fuzzy. I don't know any other way to describe it. There were also so many deep scratches in the pieces that had been filled with wood filler. It was obvious it wasn't just in one sheet, that happened in all three sheets.

If I'd had more patience, I probably would've returned all of the wood and made them re-cut new wood for me, but I couldn't force myself to go back to the Big Orange and go through the whole cutting process again, let alone trying to convince them to take back their three sheets of plywood that was in about 20 different pieces now. So I carried on.

The next mistake was getting the water based Kilz primer instead of the oil based. I don't know why it makes a difference, but it does. I actually got the Premium water based, which was more expensive than the oil based, and I'll never go that route again. The coat was thin and uneven, which is normally fine, but it was so thin that I felt I had to put a few coats of primer on.

Next mistake was that I went the cheaper route for the trim and bought the pine instead of the poplar. My thought was that I could save a few bucks here because I was painting and not staining, so the quality of the wood wouldn't be an issue. I did get the 'select pine' or whatever the high grade of pine boards are, but after working with the poplar in the last daybed, I'd stick with the poplar for painting. I actually would maybe use the pine for staining instead of painting. The poplar allows paint to go on SO much more smoothly.

And the last big huge kicker that caused a road block was me. I'm a messy crafter / builder / painter, and I'm not organized in the slightest. On the last go round of painting the daybed, I took the semi gloss paint at the end and did quite a few coats around the exterior of the daybed. I'm not the most patient with things either, so I just painted straight from the bucket onto the daybed. It worked fine then, but my paint was REALLY thick this go round, which I think is from it drying out some. After hearing a lot of "ARGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHH's" and "UUUUUGGGGHHHHHHH's" coming out from the junk room, Chris came in and poured my paint into a bowl and added a little bit of water, which helped immensely. He keeps me sane sometimes, I swear!

Semi-gloss paint is so hard to work with on furniture anyways. It's pretty tricky to get it completely smooth. I actually used my water based polyurethane at the end of this project to seal my daybed, and I think I'll use satin paint on furniture and just seal it with semi gloss to get the clean shiny look that I love so much. It's so much easier that way.

Oh yes, and there was one more thing I messed up on. All of the edges, with the exceptions of the connecting box frames are sanded and stained. I forgot to wipe off the excess stain, which meant it bled EVERYWHERE because I kept accidentally touching it and then touching something else. I'm a mess with all this crafting stuff, I really am!

But...it all worked out in the end. So, there you have it...the real story behind the second daybed! If nothing else, I hope this shows you that even when everything turns out wrong, with enough perseverance, you can still have something beautiful to show at the end that makes you proud.

Happy Hump Day!